Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Tim Teboner

WARNING: This post has nothing to do with advertising just in case that is the only reason you ever read these.

I had an interesting discovery over the weekend; let me take you back a few weeks to explain.

As a Vikings fan I have never been more terrified during the NFL draft than I was this year. During the first round of the draft I suffered from anal seepage over the possibility that if Tim Tebow was on the board the Vikings might take him. Many of my friends from college are Packer fans. Throughout the week leading up to the NFL draft, many of these fudge packing friends of mine took the time to send me texts, BBMs, BMs, etc. stating how hilarious they thought it would be if the Vikings took Tim Tebow.

I did not find this to be hilarious.

So when the Broncos inexplicably moved up and took Tim Tebow, I and the rest of my Viking fan brethren wiped the collective sweat off of our collective brows. I received texts from friends all thanking the higher powers that be that the Vikings would not be taking Tim Tebow. At that time I was rather narrow minded in not realizing that there might actually be people out there, Vikings fans included, that wanted to draft Tim Tebow. Not only that but with equal desperation that I did not want to draft him.

I realized that one of the common denominators for people I know that did not want Tim Tebow was age. All these people I speak of that were in the Tim TeNO camp...


are around my age.

My brother is a sophomore in high school and over the weekend he told me some interesting things. He wished the Vikings would have taken Tebow, he would have bought his jersey for sure and his opinion was that I was just jealous of Tim Tebow and that's why I don't like him.

Needless to say I Peter tapped him and told him to never to speak that way to me again. But this got me thinking, why does my brother like this clown? I also found out that many of his friends were also hoping that the Vikings would have drafted Tim Tebow. I even got first hand analysis from a few of these rug rats that they felt Tim Tebow would be a great player in the NFL and that they were still considering a jersey purchase.

This baffled me.

They think that Tim Tebow is the best college player ever and that he will be awesome in the NFL. I think Tim Tebow was a product of a great college system, defense, etc. and will suck in the NFL.

They love Tim Tebow's "intangibles", leadership and passion. I can't stand the way he runs around the field like a frantic person and cries after he loses, cries during press conferences and cries when his mom won't let him play for just 5 more minutes.

They think Tim Tebow is a great person who goes on mission trips and spreads his great wisdom to kids. I think he is so full of crap that if you look closely enough you can see a little bit of crap dribbling out of his ears. I am not a huge fan of famous people leveraging their fame to spread their beliefs (I will leave it at that because I do not want to use this medium to spread my own moral beliefs or anything of that nature).

Butt rather than (see what I did back there?) rant about all the things I don't like about this guy that I have never met, I ask this question...

Why would high school kids be pro Tim Tebow and young adults be anti Tim Tebow?

Do I have a theory? Of course I do. High school kids are dumb and still have football aspirations of their own like being a great leader on the field, just like Timmy (this is great, people should have aspirations, but high school kids are still dumb...when I was in high school, I was dumb). Young adults know that their athletic careers have most likely passed them by (besides softball, pick up basketball games and being the self proclaimed king of bags) and see through Tim Tebow's facade of BS.

Clearly Timmy boy has quite the following because it was just announced today that his jersey was the #1 seller in the month of April. My guess is if you see someone wearing a Tim Tebow jersey it will be a naive, pimply faced kid who is racking his brain trying to memorize the Pythagorean theorem for his or her upcoming geometry test.

Honestly, there is no way I can write about this without being completely biased. So yea, I am completely biased about this and will fully admit to it because I really can't stand Tim Tebow.

Before this gets any rantier please feel free to express your own thoughts on Mr. Teboner or don't.

I promise to put a smile on my face and come up with something more uplifting next time.

One love, one heart

Eric McPherson

Twitter: @EricWMcPherson

1 comment:

  1. Gators for life. Keep on hating, and UF will keep on stacking up the Heismans :)'